for you, baby.

i will stay with you through the ups and the downs.

i will stay with you when no one else is around.

and when the dark clouds arrive, i will stay by your side.

i know we'll be alright.

i will stay with you.

though relationship can get old

and have the tendency to grow cold,

we have something like a miracle

and i'll stay with you.

and there will be heartaches and pains,

but through it all, we will remain.

and in the end i know that we'll find love so beautiful and divine.

we'll be lovers for a lifetime, and i'll stay with you.

everything will be fine, and i will stay with you.

through the end of time, i will stay with you.

sonnet

Found

The place from where you came my mind can’t see.
And even life’s great mysteries have sense
But sense is lost to think that you found me.
My name has ne’er been breathed in sweet suspense
As softly from the place where your lips part.
The sun is brighter now than ere before.
The bluest sky compares not to my heart
So vibrant and so free. At last, these doors
That keep my heart closed off to hurt and pain
Have shook as if some supernatural force
Knows better still the happiness to gain
From being loved and feeling no remorse.
If there’s a place for you and me, my dear,
Let us reside therein and never fear.

i adore
that hand on my leg
during a twelve hour drive
that belongs to the sleeping man in the passenger seat next to me
just to remind that he's still there.

my little family

“I don't want to live. I want to love first, and live incidentally.”

-Zelda Fitzgerald

december 3rd

celebrating the Christmas season, friendship, and the birth of our dear shannon, who is her own special kind of light.

remembering my last trip to see the lights.

giving thanks for a happier life, full of light.

thanksgiving

this whole "gratitude-a-day" for november thing has been kind of difficult for me. not because i dont have a ton to be thankful for, because i absolutely do, but every day i had to search my brain for other things to be thankful for to the blogging world because my heart was screaming to post about N. every day.

words cannot adequately express my love for him.

today is thanksgiving and i am separated from him by 819 miles. so today i am thankful for skype and other methods of technological communication that let me hear his voice and see his face and i even cry a little because being away from him makes my heart ache. i hate to be a mushy blogger, but i cannot help but give thanks and praise to the Lord for bringing this man into my life.

i am thankful for my family, and for his family, and for the love and support we get from them every day. i am thankful for ruby and that N loves her as much as i do.

i am thankful for the wonderful friends who show both of us so much love on a daily basis.

i am overwhelmingly grateful to my Heavenly Father for the trials i have been given and the mistakes that i have made in the past few years. i am blessed to have grown and progressed so much in such a short time and to have come back from a very dark and lonely place. i am thankful for the Gospel and for my Savior Jesus Christ and His Atonement. i would be lost without it.

i am not perfect, but i know the blessings of life are sweet and that trials make us stronger. i try my hardest every day to be understanding and loving of everyone, and N has taught me that tenfold.

i am thankful for my life.

N.

the place from where you came my mind can't see.

and even life's great mysteries have sense

but sense is lost to think that you found me.

by the way...

don't make plans for may 11th, people. because there's gonna be a party!

days 9 & 10

yesterday i was grateful for costco. and for my sister who vacuumed the floor and couches after i swept.

today i am thankful for my dirty beach hair. it kinda gets in the way sometimes, like while kissing, but mostly it makes life easier because it takes about five seconds to do.

today i'm also thankful for aloha pineapple thick with extra bananas jamba juice and the boy who brought one to me while i was at work.

early early early this morning, an angel came over while i was getting ready for work and warmed up my car for me, AND scraped allllll the ice off my windshields. with an id card. because the angel couldn't find my ice scraper.

i love that angel.

also, i had some chocolate milk this morning. another thing to be thankful for.

sunday

maybe it was the weather, or that my sister’s boyfriend swept the floor for me despite the sling around his arm, or maybe it was the purple dress that i wore to church with the nude heels that are totally worth the pain they inflict upon my feet, or maybe it was getting to make chicken alfredo for ten of us, or seeing friends and family that i love all sitting together at the dinner table on our front lawn, or maybe it was the teasing and laughing that happened all night, or the hand on my leg under the table just to remind me that it was there, or maybe it was all the giggling that you wouldn’t think could come out of the mouths of grown men, or maybe it was the rolo cookies and the three bottles of martinelli’s and the one bottle of some interesting looking mango lemonade, or maybe it was the sweet boy doing my dishes or walking into the living room and catching some lovebirds kissing on the couch, or maybe it was just that it was sunday and sundays are the best days, but whatever it was, there was a point yesterday when i looked around me and thought, this is it. this is what it feels like, to be way behind on sleep and to have a take-home midterm and an unwritten six-page paper waiting in your backpack and to have romaine lettuce scattered all over the floor in the kitchen and a million dishes to wash and, regardless of all of that, to be utterly and irrevocably happy.